Honestly, we can feel at a bit of a loss. We have a very real desire to help others, we just lack the “how” bit.
Some people in life are easier than others and some are more difficult. Profound, right? I am going somewhere with this, I promise!
When we are trying to figure out how to help others, we should base our aid and assistance on their personality types. Some people respond better to a listening ear and encouragement, while others just need abrupt truths given to them.
It is so important to get to know the people you want to help so that you can help them in the best way possible. You definitely don’t want to drive someone away by not being alert to their personality.
Be a Friend
When I say be a friend, I don’t necessarily mean a best friend. When you are a friend to someone, it means you care and that you want their best. You’ll watch their back and look out for them in much the same way you would want another to look out for you.
Warning: this isn’t always reciprocated or appreciated.
Should this keep us from being a friend? A great question and a bit complex of an answer: It depends.
Is this person a coworker or relative that you work closely with? Is this person a random person about town that you run into once in a blue moon? Or someone in between?
Again, your answer can and should dictate your actions.
If this person is someone you work closely with or see frequently and there is friction, pray for them and work with them as best you can. Be kind, but don’t set yourself up to be a victim. Be intelligent.
This may be an incredible opportunity to practice the Bible verse that states, “For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even the tax collectors do the same?” In other words, what great victory is it to only do bare minimum? God knows whom He has placed in your life. Have faith in this knowledge and be your best knowing that He is working on you through them!
On the other hand, if the person in question is just a random person, definitely pray about it and seek direction, but also know that you can’t help every person. And there’s no need to feel guilty because God didn’t send us to help every person. He sent us for a certain group, specific individuals and we must help them well.
Is it all on you?
What if you feel like you have the opportunity to keep helping them past the same hurdle time and again? Is it all on you if your best efforts of helping someone fall flat? Do you ever wonder why your help doesn’t seem to “take” so you both can just move on?
I’ve found myself wondering the same questions. I’ve been frustrated when my help didn’t prove more helpful. But ultimately I know God has a plan and these moments are defining my character. He gives abundant grace, and if I’m feeling stuck in a rut trying to help someone, that means I’m not claiming the grace He so graciously gives.
We don’t sign up to help others because it is easy. If it were, everyone would do it. We step up because they are important to us and we care. Because we want to help another realize their potential. There are so many reasons to help others.
How long do you keep trying to help others?
I think there are two types of people. (okay, so I am sure there are many, many types, but for the sake of this topic, we’re going to roughly narrow it down to two.) Those who make an effort and those who aren’t inclined.
Those who make an effort try to work past their struggles. Yes, they might revert back to them now and again, but that is more out of human weakness than purposeful choices. Focus on how far they’ve come and cheer them on!
Those who aren’t inclined simply don’t care. No amount of encouragement and positive talk will bring them along. Distance yourself from these people. As God’s people we are made to care and we must step up and be the best that we can be! To fully step into this we must be careful to surround ourselves with those who do care – be it in your work or your personal life.
I hope this inspires you to keep helping others! When all is said and done, prayer, patience and kindness are three of the most effective tools for helping others.
“Let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we will reap if we do not grow weary.”
Until Next Time!
Hope.
PS. Sometimes I share what I need to hear. Like today, I needed this encouragement. If you have anything to add or to share I always enjoy hearing from you! Comment below or send me an email https://www.theamericanlady.com/contact-the-american-lady/